Things That Are Not Okay 1

I have a few bunch of pet peeves. Some are funny, others are not. They're not funny to me because they, obviously, annoy me. Whatever. I'm not sure why most of the population laughs when a short person is angry, but it does... and I must live with that. Forever.

1) For the love of all that is holy, quit using "hypothesis" and "theory" as if they meant the same thing! A hypothesis is a proposed explanation. You have to test it. When you test and prove said hypothesis, then that proof has to be able to be challenged. When it's repeatedly confirmed that the results will not change, then you can call it a theory. Until then, whatever the hell you think is a hypothesis because you haven't proved shit! 

2) People who take any opportunity to talk about themselves. You know those people? When you start telling a story about something that happened to you, or about how your horse decided to be a shit head and give dirty looks to the farrier, or about the awesome race you won, those people take the opportunity to say something about themselves. 

And you know what the biggest problem with them is? They don't get it. They don't get that they're rude and the biggest assholes ever because they just don't care enough to actually listen to the social cues telling them that they suck big donkey butt. Nope. It's just about them and they're stupid 10-mile run on the sun. Hey, buddy! No one cares that you think you're awesome. You're actually not that awesome and everyone thinks you're a douche. How about you ask questions about the person who's super excited about the awesome story he/she is telling? Huh? It's not that fucking hard to be courteous!

3) When people interrupt you in the middle of your sentence. Oh, geez, I'm sorry that the middle of my sentence interrupted the beginning of yours. How rude of me. Please continue with your obviously more important story. Asshole.

4) While I'm at it, people who don't listen at all, or are on their phones when you're clearly talking to them. Seriously? I mean, I'm one of the biggest assholes I know and I still listen to people. It's really not that hard. You assholes. 

5) Having to repeat myself several times because people are assholes and don't listen. Do you know how annoying it is to have to say things over and over again because people are too fucking rude to listen, or keep interrupting, or are on their phones, or are just fucking assholes and need to burn in a fucking fire!? And then they wonder why I just stop telling my story. Assholes. 

6) Spiders. Or anything that looks like a spider. Things that look like mutant spiders are the worst. 

I found this picture on the internet!

No, I take that back. Hiding spiders are the worst thing ever. Or spiders that don't die after you spray them with hair spray or something. Oh, awesome, now the spider is pissed and hiding, probably plotting my death. Good thing it looks fabulous now because my damn hair spray did nothing except make it look fabulous! 

I actually don't know how to cleverly end this entry besides writing, "Stay tuned for Things That Are Not Okay 2." So... uh, here's a picture of a triangle.